Well, where do I begin? It has been quite a while since I last posted on my blog. There have been so many things happen in the past two years. Some challenges have been good, others not so good. I have been doing a lot of writing again and am enjoying it tremendously. Since I have been writing, I feel like once again I have a voice and have things that I can share with other writers, students, children, parents and maybe artists of all kinds. I want to share my writings as well as anyone else who wants to post to my blog.
I have many tales to share and I hope to have many more as we go on this journey together. The first story that I want to share is one of two people who find themselves brought together by their dogs.
One spring
day I was walking with the dogs outside our apartment. There were
others walking their dogs, but my dogs did not appear too interested
in the other dogs, they were really too far away. But, there was one
gentleman coming towards us with a beautiful shepherd like dog.
When
Maggie saw this dog she began pulling, dragging me along to get to
that dog. She managed to pull me down to the ground and get over to
meet the dog she was so interested in. Stoney’s' owners name was
Gary, “Hi, I saw you walking your dogs, or rather were they walking
you?” I laughed, “I think that Maggie is actually the one who
walks Chief and me.” We spoke for a few minutes and then went on
our separate ways.
After
thinking for so long that I would never become involved with another
relationship with another man, I found myself interested. I saw that
Gary and Stoney walked toward the next building down from mine. I
started looking for them every time I took the dogs on a walk or even
left or entered my apartment. Gary had been so nice and all the dogs
seemed to like each other.
The first
or second day of July, we finally ran into Gary and Stoney. Once
again, I was walking with the dogs or rather, once again, Maggie was
walking us, when we saw Gary and Stoney. Maggie began pulling like
she recognized them and needed to go over and greet her friends,
dragging me along and me laughing all the way. I was a little
embarrassed that my dog had drug me along the yard to meet them. Gary
and I chatted for a while and found that we had a couple of things in
common,”I love your dog,” I said. He was equally impressed with
mine. We had a few things in common primarily our love of our pets. I
was taking Chris to Chicago with my best friend and her son for the
weekend, so I was not able to do anything with Gary, I said, “I
hope we can get together soon, but we are going to Chicago for the
4th of July.” But I knew I was definitely feeling
interested in this very kind man. He said, “I would like to get
together, I will see you soon.”
Our
weekend in Chicago was fabulous, I really did need to get away from
everything. Chris and I really enjoyed the sites and the food.
Towards
the end of the month, the dogs and I ran into Gary and Stoney again.
Gary and I talked about what we had been doing and the dogs
socialized as dogs do. As we were beginning to go our separate ways,
Gary hesitated. I waited and he asked me if I would like to do
something the next evening. I said, “yes”. We had planned to go
to Cabella's Outdoor Shop in Toledo.
I was so
excited about our date, even if it was to an outdoor shop. Gary
picked me up at 5:30 and said we were not going to Cabella's, he
decided that a better first date was dinner. He said he knew a great
restaurant in Toledo that he wanted to take me to.
The
restaurant was seafood and it was fabulous. The atmosphere in the
dining area was lovely, the décor very relaxing. We talked nonstop.
I told him that I was a very honest person and wanted him to know the
truth about me. I did not want to go into a friendship or
relationship without him knowing about what I had been through and
how I had overcome many things. It was not difficult for me to tell
Gary my story, because I knew that it was right to do so. The
funniest part of the evening was when Gary learned that I was only 40
years old. He was surprised and thought or hoped that I was older. He
said he had not ever dated anyone so much younger than he was. He was
nearly 12 years older than me and he was not sure that he was
comfortable seeing someone so much younger.
We did not
let our ages get in the way of the evening, we continued talking and
having a very good time. The evening went by so fast and the food was
excellent. I enjoyed every minute.
Gary asked
me if I would like to go with him to look at a car in another town.
He said he wanted my opinion and that he was thinking of purchasing
this car or a motorcycle. I was so surprised that he wanted my
opinion, especially so early in our friendship, but I was thrilled, I
don't think anyone I ever dated or even my ex-husband had ever asked
for and really wanted my opinion on anything. I was beginning to
think Gary was a very special man.
The next
day was a school day and I was bouncing all through the day. I was
excited and really could not tell why other than my dinner with Gary
had gone so well that going to look at a car with him seemed fun. We
drove over to where the care that he was looking for was and began
walking through the lot. There were several different colors of the
Mazda Miata. Gary asked me which one I liked the best, I like the
dark blue, but it had a hard top and Gary was looking for a soft top
since he was so tall, he did not want the top of his head bumping up
against the roof. We both agreed on a cream Miata with brown top. It
was both manual and automatic, so we decided to take it for a ride.
The car was smooth, it drove beautifully. Gary liked the car, but
wanted to think about it. I would find later that Gary always liked
to think a while before making a purchase, a very good thing to do,
by not jumping into an expense that would last for years.
Gary soon
decided that he wanted to purchase the Miata, saying that it would be
a great “play” car. He already had a truck for everyday use. He
wanted the Miata for fun and driving out in the countryside. It was
wonderful fun driving around in the Miata, he let me drive the car
back to the apartment.
Gary and I
saw one another every day for the next few weeks, even on work days.
We would go out to dinner, to a movie or just to walk around and get
a cup of coffee. I found him to be very interesting. I loved that he
saw and pointed out the details in the construction of the places we
went. At first it was different than I had ever been around, but it
was endearing. I loved spending time with Gary and the dogs all got
along fabulously.
I had not
really told anyone about the man I was dating, but when Thanksgiving
came around and I went to visit my family in Charleston, SC, I
decided to tell my family about Gary. I believed that I was in love
and this relationship was very different from any that I had been
involved in before now. It seemed that we shared everything and had
quite a lot in common, including the way we felt about major issues
and feelings. Mom was very happy for me, but wanted me to take my
time and be careful so as to not get hurt once again.
I spoke
with Gary every day while I was in Charleston. I missed him terribly
and wanted to get back to Findlay so that we could be together again.
He was so kind and gentle. I loved sitting on the sofa cuddling, even
with Stoney, and all the gentle kisses he would give me, I missed
that while I was in Charleston.
When we
got home, I could not wait until we were able to be together again.
Gary and I decided to have a cookout, with the dogs and my son Chris.
This would be the first time Chris met Gary and I was a little
nervous. Chris once told me that he would not accept anyone else as a
father, not even a step-father since he still loved his father. I was
really not expecting their meeting to go so smoothly, Chris really
seemed to like Gary. They talked a lot and spent time together. Chris
loved Stoney right away, he thought that Stoney was the coolest dog,
ever.
Gary's job
in Findlay would be over very soon and then we would not see much of
each other, since he did not really know where he would be going for
the next job. Gary builds hotels for a family owned company, The
Drury's. Since his time was limited, he was hesitant to become too
involved in our relationship, but unfortunately or fortunately we did
become very close and even talked about a future together. We had
many obstacles to overcome while we discussed our relationship and
our future, the main being that Chris wanted to stay in Findlay and
finish High School. He was only a freshman and had three years to go
until he would graduate.
We planned
on going to my parents house for Thanksgiving, since this was Rob's
year to have Chris at Christmas. My parents were anxious to meet
Gary, since I had decided that I was going to marry him. They were
wonderful to him, and he was great to them. They all got along
famously. It seemed like Gary had been in our family all along. He
seemed at ease with my family and my family was not having any
difficulty talking with or spending time with Gary. I was so relieved
that even my sister was comfortable with Gary. She talked to him
easily, when she was able to stay awake and coherent.
By
December, Gary was in Meridian, Mississippi working on a hotel and
helping out another superintendent who had not kept the project on
track. He came home every two weeks and was home at Christmas. This
was the year for Chris to spend Christmas with his father. I would
have been home alone, but I had Gary home for Christmas. He had moved
in before going to Mississippi, we thought that would be the easiest,
since we did not know how long he would be on this job. While we were
in Charleston for Thanksgiving, we had bought my wedding ring. At the
time I insisted that we could get married at the justice of the peace
and that I did not want to spend a lot of money on a big wedding. I
had originally wanted to get married over this vacation, but was not
able to pull it all together. My mother insisted that I would regret
not having a traditional wedding and was persistent in telling me
that it would be a mistake to rush the marriage and do it at City
Hall in Findlay. Gary agreed with my mother and said we should
actually take the time to plan a wedding rather than try to rush one
in just a couple of weeks. He was sure that I would be happier with
an actual traditional wedding.
Even
though the plans for a December ceremony did not go through, On
Christmas Eve Gary and I decided that we were already married in our
minds and in the eyes of God. He wanted me to wear my wedding band
and I agreed. We were officially engaged and excited to be together
and “married”.
After
Christmas, I immediately began planning the wedding. I found a dress
that I fell in love with and my mother thought was beautiful. The
only problem was that I had to order it online and would not actually
be able to try it on with my mother. The dress would come and I would
try it on and decide if it fit properly.
When the
dress arrived, Chris had to help me get into the dress, it was lace
with buttons all the way down the back. I took pictures and sent them
to my mother. The pictures did not do the dress justice, but mom
would be able to see the dress at the end of January when Gary and I
went to Charleston to begin the planning for the wedding. I had
booked rooms at the “Pink Palace”, the Palmer House, downtown
Charleston on East Bay Street. The plan was to have the wedding there
in the gardens and then spend two spectacular nights at the bed and
breakfast for our honeymoon.
When Gary
and I got to Charleston, we stayed at my parent's house. They were
very happy to have us and we were happy to see them again. The next
day, we planned to go to the bed and breakfast, first to walk around
and take a small tour. When we got there, I fell in love immediately
with the house. As we walked around and entered the front room of the
inn, I immediately fell in love with the room. It had large windows
and was very open and inviting, it took less than a minute for me to
decide that I wanted to have the ceremony in this room, we all agreed
that it would be more beautiful that outside and would have the exact
romantic feel that I was looking for in this wedding ceremony. There
were winding stairwells, that I would be able to descend on the way
to the room where my future husband would be waiting for me.
Once we
were satisfied with our visit to the Palmer House, we had an
appointment with the florist. Our Florist was also downtown, near
MUSC. When we walked in we were thrilled by what we saw in the
showroom, This florist appeared to be quite talented. She began by
showing us a few of her photo albums. I was so excited with the fresh
flowers and various bouquets that she had created for other brides.
She asked me what my favorite flowers were and I told her peonies and
roses. I found a bouquet that was similar to what I was thinking and
decided that was what I wanted. The entire bouquet was fresh flowers
and absolutely beautiful. I also ordered bouquets smaller, but
similar to mine for my bridesmaids, Kelli, Audra and Lauren. We also
ordered boutonnieres for Gary, Dad, Michael, Thomas and Chris. I
wanted to keep the ceremony simple, yet elegant.
While we
were at the florist, we discussed the type of cake that I wanted. I
wanted a simple chocolate/vanilla cake with butter-cream icing topped
with fresh flowers. Mom said she thought that we should have a
traditional cake topper. The florist was very nice and suggested that
we take a look at some of the cakes she had done with fresh flowers.
She also told mom that it was a current trend for brides to order
simple cakes and place fresh flowers for the decoration. Finally,
after looking at several cakes, mom said that the flowers on the cake
did look very pretty and that maybe that was the best way to go.
That
evening while we were eating dinner, we all had something to say
about how well the day had gone. Gary and I would be leaving in the
morning to get back to Findlay for work on Monday. My father was even
getting excited about the events during planning the wedding. Gary
and I decided that we would need to plan on coming back to Charleston
in February to ensure that the plans were going as we wanted. During
the next visit mom and I would plan on bridesmaid gifts, any
centerpieces we would need for tables and any other things that we
could plan during that visit.
During the
visit to Charleston in February, we also planned a visit and meeting
with the minister who would be officiating the ceremony. When we met
him, our chat went very well, he appeared to be exactly the person
Gary and I would want to officiate our ceremony. The minister had
given us several ideas of ceremonies that he had officiated and asked
us to look them over and determine what we would like to include in
our own personalized ceremony.
Spring
vacation finally came! It was the weekend that Gary and I were going
to be married, I was so excited and a little bit nervous that not
everything would go as planned. We got to Charleston and to my
parents in time for dinner. It was Thursday evening and everyone was
excited about the coming events. My best friend, Kelli had also
arrived in Charleston, she was staying at a hotel at Patriot's Point.
She was looking forward, not only to the wedding, but to laying by
the pool and getting a wonderful Charleston tan.
Saturday
was here! We all had appointments for getting our hair done at 10:00
in the morning. All the girls had gotten their nails done during the
week before we all got together the other night. We had planned on
all going together for hair and nails, but since Kelli and I lived
out of state, we were not able to schedule everything together. At
least we were all able to get our hair done at the same time, so that
we would be able to see how we all looked. It was very exciting!
Lauren had her hair swept up and Audra decided at the last minute to
have hers done in an up-sweep as well. The both looked absolutely
beautiful and it was amazing how much Lauren looked like her mother.
Kelli and Mom had their hair done fancy, but fairly normal, they
looked lovely. Anne did my hair and made it stay in place and it did
not look fancy and unrecognizable. When we were finished we had to
hurry back to the house to get our things together so that mom and I
could get downtown. We both wanted to get our makeup done before we
left, but that was not completely possible, the hairdresser had taken
longer than we had planned.
Mom and I
got to the Palmer House in time to get some of the decorations and
flowers together and then go upstairs to my room to begin getting
ready and dressed.
We had
hired a photographer, who ended up being absolutely the most creative
photographer I had ever met. She took photos exactly the way we
asked, they were all very natural looking, with nothing being very
posed and fake. She was able to take the photographs in such a way so
as not to intrude on the events of the day. When I did get to see
them a few weeks later, I was even more impressed, she had done a
beautiful job with our wedding, capturing every wonderful moment.
When my
sister came in, things were all in a whirl, she immediately found the
wine and began drinking. She was very happy and seemed genuinely
happy for me. It was the first time in a long time that I saw my
sister in such a relaxed and good mood, it was great to have her
really there aware and cognizant at my wedding. Lauren was in a great
mood as well, she was excited to be in the wedding and looked superb
in her dress. She, Audra and my mother had gone to the wedding shop
in North Charleston to choose their dresses according to the colors I
had chosen for my wedding. Kelli and I had gone up to Toledo to
choose her dress. Unfortunately, Kelli's dress was a completely
different color than we were looking for originally, but it was the
most beautiful dress for her and I decided that was the most
important thing. She did not believe that she was going to look
sensational in it, but she did and everyone thought so.
Gary and I
had decided to get the boys involved in the ceremony as well. We
chose a sand ceremony to represent the blending of our families.
Though we only had Chris on the invitation, it was important to both
of us to include all three boys. The sand ceremony was beautiful and
I was able to keep the glass container with the sand that we had
blended as a family in a stand to remember everything that had gone
on the day of our wedding.
The
ceremony was beautiful and very emotional, both Gary and I had tears
in our eyes at various times in the ceremony. We were able to say
everything that we meant to each other in front of our friends and
families. I could not have asked for a more perfect day. After the
ceremony, I felt so happy, I just wanted to laugh and dance. I felt
so thrilled that the wedding had been the dream wedding I had always
wanted. Once everyone had a chance to talk and socialize, we went
into the dining room to cut the cake and have champagne. We were all
talking and my father made a toast. I decided that that was the time
I wanted to toast my parents and family for sticking by me at some of
my most difficult times and for sharing this wonderful day with Gary
and me. I got a little tipsy and of course, my graceful self fell
back on the floor, Gary helped me up and we all laughed.
We planned
on having everyone to dinner at A.W. Shuck's, a restaurant downtown
know for it's seafood. It was a great place to gather, especially
with a larger group. Once everyone arrived, we ordered drinks and
decided to talk about what appetizers everyone wanted. Gary and I had
no idea how much the whole thing would cost, but we wanted everyone
to have a wonderful time. The whole evening was fabulous, everyone
enjoyed everything they ate and the conversations were terrific. I
was able to go around and talk with everyone and even Ryan and his
friend were able to join us for dinner. We all drank too much, but
Gary and I were walking, we did not have to drive anywhere.
After
dinner, everyone went their separate ways so that Gary and I could
get on with our honeymoon. We went across the street and decided to
go for a carriage tour around Charleston. After the tour we began
walking back towards the bed and breakfast for the evening. I was so
happy and delightfully exhausted. The room that we had at the Palmer
House was elegant and gorgeous, we had a four post bed that was
extremely comfortable. The evening was gloriously romantic.
The next
day we spent a relaxing morning and afternoon at the Palmer House. I
had to work for a while on my thesis, the unfortunate part of getting
married during the semester, or while working and going to school. It
did not matter that I had to work on my thesis the day was
extraordinary any way. We were able to relax and spend time together,
which was the most important thing for us.
On Easter
Sunday, we planned on having dinner with my parents. We went over in
the middle of the afternoon, around 2:00, and were able to spend time
with them and talk about the weekend and how things went. We left
early to get back to the inn so that we could have some time to
ourselves. We would have to leave early to get back to my parents to
pick up the boys so that we could go back to Findlay by the evening
to get ready for work and school the next day.
Although
it was as long a trip as always, it seemed to go by quickly since I
was with Gary and knew that we were husband and wife. Chris seemed
extremely happy for us all to be together, too. We got home early
enough to get ready for the next day of work and school. Thankfully,
we would not be going to bed too late and all be exhausted for the
next day.
It was going to be
very important, as always to be completely honest with Gary and
important that we make decisions together so as not to leave each
other out of our thoughts, ideas and decisions.
Gary has been a wonderful husband and always encourages me to pursue my ideas and gifts. I have wanted to be a writer for quite some time. He has encouraged and even urged me to continue writing. He loves me for who I am as I honor and love him for who he is.
